2.11.15

Tumblring, googling on mental health while The Secret Life of the Manic Depressive plays in the background. Thinking how every battle won against darkness and demons is a hard-won one, and thinking back on what I had experienced earlier this year, and how fortunate that I am climbing my way back up now, how the plateau of emotions is a good one and how I must be grateful for all these blessings – small and large, even if they at prima facie don’t seem to account for much. It is enough, I am enough, and life is a bounty with excesses spilling over like foam from a champagne glass.

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2.11.15

Happy Birthday Daddy + Crab feast + Halloween

Happy all saints day!

Things to improve on for my Final Paper for this module

  • Always use present tense when describing literary work
  • LINK single, isolated observations to thesis
  • LINK POINTS TO THESIS
  • Avoid passive voice
  • RELATE BACK TO F-ING THESIS
  • Explain explicitly to reader how ideas you’ve raised in each paragraph relatees back and helps to prove your overall thesis about primitivism and colonial ideology

31.10.15

I believe in God

I believe in redemption after mistakes

I believe in hope

I believe in the power of words

I believe in a brother and friend in Christ Jesus

I am thankful for my ahma my parents and my sister

I am thankful for my material.comforts

I’m thankful for the plateau of human emotions this semester.

I lift my burdens and worries to you, God. Help buoy me through the academic sea till December. Help me focus and buckle down to.finishing my aassignments with pride, intelligence and.knowledge. Thank you God.

28.10.15

🙂 Thankful for

  • A for 10% personal reflection (TS) – although it is a bit marred by the B for our group performance
  • A+ for 15% performance critique (TS)
  • 85 for Merlion essay

Thank you, God.

Now back to the grind of Eliot, and my looming three giant deadlines

25.10.15

I’ll never know how much it costs

To see my sin upon that cross.

When I fall down you pick me up,

When I am dry you fill my cup,

You are my all in all.

You are my strength when I am weak,

You are the treasure that i seek.

All my regrets, all my acclaim,

the joy and the pain I am making them Yours.

Things in the past, things yet unseen,

wishes and dreams that are yet to come true,

All of my hopes, all of my plans,

my heart and my hands I lift them to You.

Lord I offer my life to you, everything I’ve been through,

use it for your glory.

Lord I offer my days to You, lifting my praise to You,

as a pleasing sacrifice,

Lord I offer You my life

All that I am

All that I have,

I lay them down before You oh Lord,

all my regrets, all my acclaim,

the joy and the pain I’m making them yours.

22.10.15

Week 10. One test (tomorrow), one term paper proposal (next week), three papers and four finals to conquer by 1 December.

I wish I had the knack for Literature as I did back in secondary school and junior college. I am not sure at what point, how, and why, did I sudden feel so lukewarm and even hostile towards a discipline I once loved with such childlikeness. I do not know how to even study for this open book test (open-book — deceptively ‘easy’) nor how to write essays. University is a mad mad whirl and I am caught up in this storm. I want to be able to whip up deep and insightful observations, scrawl out beautiful essays and savour the beauty of Literature in its full glory, once more. I feel like I am putting in effort but perhaps not the right amount / way? I do not know what I am doing or not doing wrong. I would like some shut-eye now but I should be doing more reading.